Responding to the Failure to Grieve Great Loss
Return to Our 2025 Lenten Pilgrimage of Hope
Deep transitions are times of loss.
Rev. Bryan Massingale
Bryan Massingale states, “A refusal to lament is a form of privilege and escape.” Reflecting on Biblical scholar Walter Brueggeman, Massingale says, “Without grief, without lament, the pain and disorientation of seismic cultural change becomes rage and erupts in wrath. Sadness at loss that is unnamed and unvoiced becomes expressed in a lack of hospitality, vengefulness, and cruelty.”
He continues by saying, “Laments pierce the crusty callouses of numbness, cynicism, indifference, and denial. Lament does not accept the status quo. Lament demands change. Lament, then, transforms bystanders into witnesses. BUT—and this is key—lament becomes the prelude to action and change. Lamenting allows us to greet the arrival of the new as a gift, not a threat. Lament frees the imagination for legacy and gift.”
Let Us Pray
God of Compassion, we cry out in fear and blindness. We do not want to see our complicity in the reality of our world today. We are comfortable in the status quo of our own small world. We are tired of the loss… loss of our customs, traditions, and those we love. Give us strength to grieve in a culture that says we shouldn’t. Help us to recognize that grief is the antidote to denial, and it is only our dependence on your generous love that will bring about a “new heaven and a new earth (Rev 21:1).
Reflection Questions
- How does the practice of lament or expressing grief allow me to process difficult emotions and deepen my relationship with God and others?
- How might lament help transform me from a bystander to a witness of God’s love and mercy?
Hope In Action
Take the time necessary to face the emotions stirred by loss and ever-changing circumstances. Understand that lament is not despair. Lament is the grief in that space between what is and what should be. We do not lament for lament’s sake but to heal so that we can move into action, be it prayer, volunteering, or advocacy. Every effort, when combined with others, makes a difference!